Today has been one of those days where everything--and I mean everything--is going wrong and getting in my way. This morning, I couldn't find the sandpaper in the shed. I ran out of coffee grounds. The kids were arguing, fussing, and hitting. And Olivia threw up.
So yeah, I'm a little frustrated. And don't you start laughing!
But these are the kind of days where I need God most. Last night, I went out in the backyard to clean up from a water balloon fight I'd had with some friends and my sister that afternoon. I was listening to my iPod while doing this. After throwing the last of the colorful pieces in the trash can, one of my favorite songs came on. It goes like this, you may have heard it on the radio:
And all at once, heads are spinning faster like a hurricane. 'Cause all we did was nothing but a Love still came, & it's bringing in good news, that love is coming back for you.
Keep in mind that I have no idea what got into me. Maybe it's because I've always had trouble with the "love" part of God. Or perhaps it was because I walked down to the front of the church for the first time the other day when my friends and I went to hear Ken Freeman. Or maybe I'd just had a good day.
Whatever it was, I just started running across the yard, jumped in the air, spun around...I was so HAPPY! I've never had a moment like that...ever. I was just overjoyed that Jesus really does love me. And why in the world would he choose me anyway?? It just fascinates me that he doesn't care how bad I've screwed up. It never gets old for me. Which probably explains why I never shutup about it.
After my little, uh...outburst, or whatever you want to call it, I got on the swing for a while. It was about 9:00 pm. It had finally cooled down outside, the mosquitoes weren't biting, the katydids were singing, there was a little breeze...and that song, oh my gosh, it was STUCK IN MY HEAD! No more horrible sentences running through my mind, no more beating the crap out of myself, no more worrying if so-and-so was okay, or if such-and-such needed to be done...it was just me and God. Just a little bit of heaven, right there in my little backyard in Oklahoma.
And I'm so thankful for it, because I needed a little bit of heaven.
Love is coming back for all of us who have a hard time getting it through our brains that all we did was nothing but a Love still came, and it's bringing in good news, that love is coming back like a hurricane...
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
And the years go by...
Where does time go? It feels like 7 years ago was just yesterday...
I remember the Summer the Montgomery family lived with us. Us kids would play outside all day long, making mudpies, playing "wolves", "maids", and once we even got big building blocks and tried to build a wall that would cut the yard in half. We never finished, but I thought it was pretty impressive. Then at night, we'd all go to our room while the adults played cards, and we'd play with our Barbies for HOURS. Or we'd play computer games, American Idol, or make up our own. One game we made up we took turns jumping off of the bed and banging ourselves against the closet door. I would've loved to have been a fly on the wall that night! It's amazing what four cups of coffee and being allowed to stay up past midnight will do to a kid.
I remember when I'd go to the back of the yard where there was a concrete slab, and throw bricks down on it just because I liked watching them shatter. And all the plays and dances we made up....I directed them all of course. Then after showing the parents, we were all so proud of ourselves...
I remember the many times we fought, though. It was amazing, the things we actually got all worked up over...what was even more amazing was how quickly we got over it and apologized.
I've been thinking a lot about the future lately. I seriously wonder if I'm going to come out of these years in one piece...sometimes it's all I can do to get out of bed in the morning. How am I going to meet all my goals for my life doing THAT?
But then I remember how far I've come. Gosh, I can't believe I've made it this far. I'm going to be 16 this year! Can you believe it??
Looking back on the years is difficult for me sometimes. There's some really tough stuff back there. There are things I wish never happened; decisions I've come to regret. But there are also great memories that still make me laugh when I think of them. We were all so ornery, I'm surprised we got away with what we did!
Looking back reminds me that even when things look hopeless, there is still an answer. It reminds me to be thankful for what I have been given, to be proud if what I have achieved, and to work on what I haven't. It reminds me that I need to make the most of the time I have, because I don't know if it's short or long.
And it reminds me to sit back and enjoy life when I get the opportunity, because time is something I will never get back.
Man...where does the time go?
And the years go by like stones under rushing water. We only know, we only know when it's gone...
--Need To Breathe
I remember the Summer the Montgomery family lived with us. Us kids would play outside all day long, making mudpies, playing "wolves", "maids", and once we even got big building blocks and tried to build a wall that would cut the yard in half. We never finished, but I thought it was pretty impressive. Then at night, we'd all go to our room while the adults played cards, and we'd play with our Barbies for HOURS. Or we'd play computer games, American Idol, or make up our own. One game we made up we took turns jumping off of the bed and banging ourselves against the closet door. I would've loved to have been a fly on the wall that night! It's amazing what four cups of coffee and being allowed to stay up past midnight will do to a kid.
I remember when I'd go to the back of the yard where there was a concrete slab, and throw bricks down on it just because I liked watching them shatter. And all the plays and dances we made up....I directed them all of course. Then after showing the parents, we were all so proud of ourselves...
I remember the many times we fought, though. It was amazing, the things we actually got all worked up over...what was even more amazing was how quickly we got over it and apologized.
I've been thinking a lot about the future lately. I seriously wonder if I'm going to come out of these years in one piece...sometimes it's all I can do to get out of bed in the morning. How am I going to meet all my goals for my life doing THAT?
But then I remember how far I've come. Gosh, I can't believe I've made it this far. I'm going to be 16 this year! Can you believe it??
Looking back on the years is difficult for me sometimes. There's some really tough stuff back there. There are things I wish never happened; decisions I've come to regret. But there are also great memories that still make me laugh when I think of them. We were all so ornery, I'm surprised we got away with what we did!
Looking back reminds me that even when things look hopeless, there is still an answer. It reminds me to be thankful for what I have been given, to be proud if what I have achieved, and to work on what I haven't. It reminds me that I need to make the most of the time I have, because I don't know if it's short or long.
And it reminds me to sit back and enjoy life when I get the opportunity, because time is something I will never get back.
Man...where does the time go?
And the years go by like stones under rushing water. We only know, we only know when it's gone...
--Need To Breathe
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Lessons Learned From Monopoly
I had a fantastic weekend! On Friday, my family and I went over to my cousins house and stayed the night. We rode the four wheeler like maniacs, jumped on the trampoline, had a mud fight, almost killed the dog, found about a million tarantulas (they were orange and black. SO COOL!), and stayed up until 1:00 am playing Monopoly.
I was doing pretty good for a while. I bought Boardwalk pretty much right off the bat, and later sold it for $500 with no future charges on any of the blue districts, AND Water Works. After that, I collected all of the pink districts, and two of the green. I had about $2,000 at this point.
Then out of no where, my cousin Sarah started catching up. In no time, she had all of my sisters money and property, which put her out of the game. Then she took out Brianna.
Then she started working on me.
I fought so hard. I tried so hard to keep my money and my property, but in the end I had to mortgage and she took EVERYTHING. I came back later and she'd trampled everyone else, too. She won the game.
None of us were real happy with her.
But that's okay. We forgave her, since we're such nice people and everything. ;)
Before going to bed that night (which was around 2 I might add), I read a devotional in a book I have by Sarah Young. It was talking about how health and wealth can disappear just like that (picture me snapping my fingers), but it's what's eternal that really matters.
I thought it was kind of ironic that I'd open up the book and find that right after going bankrupt playing Monopoly.
It may seem like how much money you have, how many things you own, or whether or not you have two cars are top priority. But really, God is top priority, and that's the way it should be.
Here's some footage of the interesting things that happen at the Cowan's. Enjoy!
Kelsey tried to throw mud at my face...and it landed at the top of an 8 foot roof. Nice throw, Queso!
Olivia my dear, I know you like shoes & all...but aren't those a little too big?
I'll post videos tomorrow.
Manana amigos!
I was doing pretty good for a while. I bought Boardwalk pretty much right off the bat, and later sold it for $500 with no future charges on any of the blue districts, AND Water Works. After that, I collected all of the pink districts, and two of the green. I had about $2,000 at this point.
Then out of no where, my cousin Sarah started catching up. In no time, she had all of my sisters money and property, which put her out of the game. Then she took out Brianna.
Then she started working on me.
I fought so hard. I tried so hard to keep my money and my property, but in the end I had to mortgage and she took EVERYTHING. I came back later and she'd trampled everyone else, too. She won the game.
None of us were real happy with her.
But that's okay. We forgave her, since we're such nice people and everything. ;)
Before going to bed that night (which was around 2 I might add), I read a devotional in a book I have by Sarah Young. It was talking about how health and wealth can disappear just like that (picture me snapping my fingers), but it's what's eternal that really matters.
I thought it was kind of ironic that I'd open up the book and find that right after going bankrupt playing Monopoly.
It may seem like how much money you have, how many things you own, or whether or not you have two cars are top priority. But really, God is top priority, and that's the way it should be.
Here's some footage of the interesting things that happen at the Cowan's. Enjoy!
Kelsey tried to throw mud at my face...and it landed at the top of an 8 foot roof. Nice throw, Queso!
Olivia my dear, I know you like shoes & all...but aren't those a little too big?
I'll post videos tomorrow.
Manana amigos!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Swept Away
"Spread out your open hands, and he will raise you up."
Sometimes people, including myself, present themselves as a different person than they are on the inside. I confess to being fake both with other people and with my God. Have you ever been broken on the inside, but walked into church on Sunday morning or youth group Wednesday night acting as if you had it all together? That's a subtle way people pretend, but it can get out of hand very quickly until you practically have two or more identities. You play "chameleon", changing your appearance & act depending on who you're with.
But the thing is, God sees everything in you, and knows every single thing about you--everything you've done, thought, or ever will do or think.
Now, as scary as that might sound, there's more to it than that. Yeah, he sees everything you do. He knows when you've messed up. He saw it with his own eyes.
But...
He does not condemn.
Instead of seeing you through eyes of law, he looks at you through eyes of grace. What that means is, he doesn't look at you in your sin (no matter what your sin is) and say, "Dang, she's screwed up. Ok, moving on to someone actually worth my time."
No, he looks at you and says, "Yes, she (or he) has made some mistakes. She's not perfect. But I want to forgive her for what she's done because I love her anyway."
And not only that, but he will make you something great. He will do things through you that you would never be able to do on your own. That's not to say he'll force it. But if you let him take the initiative, you'll be amazed at the change in yourself. You will be able to handle life SO much better. Trust me, if it weren't for him, I would not be here.
Until then, think about the lyrics to this song. Being yourself with people makes things less complicated, and even better--being yourself with God will free you & heal you from the inside out.
"Spread out your open hands, and he will raise you up."
*Note--this song has screaming.
Sometimes people, including myself, present themselves as a different person than they are on the inside. I confess to being fake both with other people and with my God. Have you ever been broken on the inside, but walked into church on Sunday morning or youth group Wednesday night acting as if you had it all together? That's a subtle way people pretend, but it can get out of hand very quickly until you practically have two or more identities. You play "chameleon", changing your appearance & act depending on who you're with.
But the thing is, God sees everything in you, and knows every single thing about you--everything you've done, thought, or ever will do or think.
Now, as scary as that might sound, there's more to it than that. Yeah, he sees everything you do. He knows when you've messed up. He saw it with his own eyes.
But...
He does not condemn.
Instead of seeing you through eyes of law, he looks at you through eyes of grace. What that means is, he doesn't look at you in your sin (no matter what your sin is) and say, "Dang, she's screwed up. Ok, moving on to someone actually worth my time."
No, he looks at you and says, "Yes, she (or he) has made some mistakes. She's not perfect. But I want to forgive her for what she's done because I love her anyway."
And not only that, but he will make you something great. He will do things through you that you would never be able to do on your own. That's not to say he'll force it. But if you let him take the initiative, you'll be amazed at the change in yourself. You will be able to handle life SO much better. Trust me, if it weren't for him, I would not be here.
Until then, think about the lyrics to this song. Being yourself with people makes things less complicated, and even better--being yourself with God will free you & heal you from the inside out.
"Spread out your open hands, and he will raise you up."
*Note--this song has screaming.
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